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2009 Grammys. Good Tunes But God-awful Garb.

Above: Bono performs at the 2009 Grammy Awards

Today, my Grammy coverage is really going to focus on the fashions. Why? Because if you missed the music, you can buy the albums or download the songs. And nowadays you can basically view on the performances on youtube, and get lots of great musical reviews available for you on other sites from critics far more versed in music than me. You can even see the acceptance speeches here. And because ...well... it's my blog.

Yes, Radiohead rocked (they should have opened the show, sorry Bono) and Coldplay was as entertaining as expected. Some fab duets and lots of rappin' added to the entertainment. Utter respect for Sir Paul McCartney and Stevie Wonder as the Bonus Jonas abounded.

above: Justin teams up with Al Green as they did at last years' grammys.

Above: Stevie Wonder as the Bonus Jonas

Extra drama? MIA was due to give birth that night (I waited for her water to break as she pranced around onstage in that godawful get up) and the Rihanna/ Chris Brown saga added some dark reality.

above: M.I.A. performing the very day she was due to give birth.

Kid Rock cleaned up nice, lil' Wayne didn't clean himself up at all and it was great to see Neil, Smokey, Stevie, Paul, Robert Plant and other music legends.

above: Lil' Wayne could take a lesson from Justin when it comes to dressing for an awards show.

Although she was one of the few well-dressed women, there were some questions about Whitney's strange enunciation (was she wasted or trying extra hard not to be?).

Suffice it to say, the nominated songs were all pretty wonderful and the winners were not much of a surprise. The show had some really fabulous duets (justin had two) and wonderful tributes, but the fashions....well, they were less than harmonious, to say the least.

Apparently Jennifer Hudson's dinner napkin got stuck to her chest...

but she redeemed herself in her black sequin number in which she performed (and rightly received a standing O) later in the show:

Is Natalie Cole bound in chains to keep her from engaging in substance abuse?

Mama M.I.A!
True, M.I.A was due to give birth that very night, but that is no excuse for these ensembles, I don't care how bad her hormones were raging:

and the outfit in which she performed onstage? Yikes.

While I love Coldplay (who doesn't?), Thank God they acknowledged, and apologized to Sir Paul for, their bad version of the Beatles' Sgt. Pepper jackets.

Okay, for those young uns, here's the original Sgt. Pepper jackets:

And although I thought Estelle's American Boy duet with Kanye was one of the best of the night, her alien garb was simply Jestons gone bad.

And frankly, (I may get pummeled for this one) Kanye looked like Michael Jackson with the glitter blazer and gloves, yech:

Rapper T.I. was somewhere in between well dressed and not dressed up, but still looked better than Kanye:

Oh Paula....

Singers (left) and rapper T-Pain looked really smart ... NOT:

A bit of an Ed Hardy Overdose:

Katy Perry may be bi-adorable, but her live performance of "I Kissed a Girl" pretty much sucked and lacked any subtlety as she emerged in a phallic banana and pranced around onstage channeling Carmen Miranda:

By the way, ever notice how much she resembles actress Jenny McCarthy??

Is it just me, or is John Mayer coming off creepier than ever these days?

and it's true, Carrie Underwood did have awesome legs:

and Kid Rock cleaned up nice as he channeled G-d by opening with Amen, closing with Rock n' Roll Jesus and giving a tribute to the recently deceased member of Lynrd Skynrd in between:

the few saving graces included the always well dressed Gwinnie (who is also the wife of Coldplay's Chris Martin), but what was with that hair?:

And kudos go to Sheryl Crow, Kate Beckinsdale, Queen Latifah, Miley Cyrus and Taylor Swift for dressing appropriately. (I know I am forgetting others, but it's easier to remember the horrendous clothes).

Other shockers: Morgan Freeman and Kenny Chesney are best buds? Paul McCartney is playing at Coachella? Apparently, yep.

A complete list of all the winners, courtesy of the Telegraph, can be found here.

Here's a list of all the nominees, the winners have a grammy icon to the left of their name.

The LA Times has a list by category (this one is the easiest to read of them all) of the nominees and winners, where the winners are in bold italics here.

Official Grammy site here.

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