A Doctor AND A Lawyer? I'm Gonna Need A Cold Shower. Introducing Porn4Jews.

Lately, there have been so many wonderful things shared by my friends on Facebook, I can hardly keep up. Here's one that will make any self-respecting, matzoh-munching Jew (and goyishe friends thereof) giggle, assuming you have a sense of humor.

The tumblr site, Porn4Jews - 5,000 years of tradition. 5,000 years of sexy, is a tongue in cheek collection of memes that play off on the cultural stereotypes*, clichés and traditions most often associated with Judaism.



Created by New York based writer/director/filmmaker/actress 23 year old Sarah Rosen, the site, which is barely a month old, has been featured on HuffPo as something even your Bubbe can appreciate.


above: Sarah, herself, appears in some of the memes

Owning real estate, attending therapy, earned doctorates and law degrees, food.... these are the things that make Jews hot under the Tallit.











The Huffington Post article reports that the models are all Jewish friends of Sarah's from a variety of backgrounds. One is an Israeli fimmaker at NYU, one is a Russian actor/model, some are old friends, or people that attended Yale University with her.

"I first came up with the idea after reading that PEW study in the NY Times that basically said that American Jews are assimilating more and identifying as Jewish less. My own Jewishness has always been really important to me, and the idea for Porn4Jews came from my wanting to humorously celebrate that."


above: Sarah Rosen, the brainchild of Porn4Jews

Sarah tells HuffPo that an unexpected bonus of the project was the formation of a community bonding over the blog's making. Together, with the models and photographer, Philadelphia-based Tom Stokes, Sarah was able to bring people together with dirty jokes about dreidels, the Torah, Birthright and more.

"It's also been really cool seeing how Jews from all over (France, Canada, Israel) relate to the blog and find it funny... We had a blast taking the photos -- it was a very collaborative process. Everyone was pitching captions, trying to find the funniest one."

They are accepting submissions and have plans to publish a book.

See more at Porn4Jews

*And no, being cheap is not a stereotype amongst Jews - that's a mean one made up by bitter, poor non-jews.

Mensch On a Bench Gives Elf On A Shelf Some Company.

Originally I was going to title this post "Mensch On A Bench Gives The Elf On A Shelf Some Competition." but given the relatively small amount of Jews and the growing number of mixed marriages, 'company' was a more appropriate term for the new holiday combination book and toy.



NPR reports that during a visit to a store last holiday season, Jewish father Neal Hoffman felt bad telling his son Jake that he couldn't have an The Elf on the Shelf . The widely popular Christmas toy is intended to watch children's behavior for Santa. Hoffman kept thinking, maybe there could be something similar, but rooted in Jewish tradition.


above: Neal Hoffman with the toy inspired by his son.

Hoffman, a former Hasbro employee, decided Mensch on a Bench was the answer. "A mensch means a really good person. It's a person that you strive to be," he says.

He raised more than $20,000, using the crowdfunding website Kickstarter, last spring. Since then, the interest has been tremendous. After the product arrived "we sold out in two weeks," Hoffman tells Michel Martin, host of NPR's Tell Me More.


above: In a few short years, the "Elf on the Shelf" picture book and accompanying elf doll transformed from a local Atlanta phenomenon to a national sensation sold in 12,000+ stores. About 2.5 million had been sold by December 2011.

Hoffman decided early on that Mensch on a Bench wouldn't be just a toy. An accompanying book is inspired by the story of Hanukkah.



In it, a fictional character called Moshe tells Judah and the Maccabees he will watch over the oil while they sleep in the Temple. "They say, oh Moshe, thank you so much. You're such a mensch sitting on that bench, watching over the oil!"


above: Jake Hoffman inspired his father to create Mensch on a Bench.

He also created eight rules for having a mensch. "They range from singing and playing dreidel and doing latkes with your family, to having the mensch watch over your menorah. ... Also, one night of Hanukkah, you're not going to get presents. You're going to go out ... buy presents for somebody in need, and you're going to give them to somebody else."



Mensch on the Bench tells the story of Moshe the Mensch, who was in the temple with the Maccabees when they won the war against the Greeks. There was only enough oil for one night and everyone was exhausted from the war and wanted to go to sleep. But what if the oil went out while the Jews were sleeping?

From the back of the temple, Moshe offered to stay up all night and watch the oil. He would sit on the bench all night. Judah called him a Mensch...and a child joked "The Mensch on the Bench" and so the name stuck.

The Mensch on the Bench book and doll tells the 8 rules of having a Mensch, which are meant to drive more jewish family traditions and re-enforce the values we want to hand down to our children.

The Mensch On A Bench is already sold out on their site, but can be pre-ordered for 2014

A Sol Lewitt Modern Art Yarmulke For Artsy Fartsy Jews.

Not that it's on the top of everyone's shopping list, but it ain't easy to find an interesting Yarmulke or kippah (the skullcaps that are worn by Orthodox men or other jewish men in synagogue or during prayer). Most of them are the familiar navy blue velvet with metallic stitched stars of David or, if you want to be a rebel, there's the creepy colored hippie-like crochet ones. Once upon a time Jonathan Adler carried a pretty cool one, but he no longer carries it nor is it sold anywhere else.

But now you can be sporting an original piece of contemporary art by the late Sol Lewitt on your capi (that's Yiddish for 'head').



This four-panel leather kippah features a digital print of the Star of David that is inspired by the ark doors Lewitt designed for the Connecticut synagogue Beth Shalom Rodfe Zedek in 2001.



Lewitt co-designed the Connecticut synagogue with architect Stephen Lloyd and the synagogue tried repeatedly to translate the radiant, geometric design the artist made for the ark doors into the convex form of a yarmulke. When the design was finally achieved it sold out almost instantly and since then there have been six more editions including this one which is the 7th and final.



Each edition varied in trim color and the color of the inside fabric, but all shared the same six-pointed star design, a common motif in the late artist's work. The 7th edition design features a bright blue trim and a gray interior with the edition details in gold lettering. It is an open edition.

$36, buy it here

The Menurkey - A Thanksgivukkah Candelabra Created By A 9 Year Old.

above: glazed textured Menurkey shown

Although I won't be adding it to my carefully curated list of modern menorahs, the Menurkey is something us Jews celebrating Hanukkah this year ought to at least know of.


above: smooth plaster Menurkey shown

Since this year's Festival of Lights falls on Turkey Day (an extremely rare occurrence that last time happened in 1861), it was inevitable that someone would create something such as this. The fact that it's the brainchild of a 9 year old makes it even better.



The Menurkey is a combination Menorah/Turkey conceived of, designed and named by 9 year old Asher Weintraub, a fourth grader from New York City, who thought of the idea and the name when he learned of this strange calendar anomaly. He says one of the reasons he thought people might like to have a turkey menorah was because the holidays were similar – because in some way both commemorate being ‘thankful.’


above image of Asher with his Menurkey courtesy of WSJ


How he made it: 
Asher used Tinkercad, a 3D modeling platform, to make the first sketches of the prototype:


Makerbot Studios then stepped in to help out by printing the 3D prototype:


Ceramic artist Connie Smith of the Etsy shop doters adapted Asher's design to create the first prototypes for the Menurkey in plasticene, with two different exterior textures:





The Finished Editions
The Menurkeys are being made in a limited run of textured ceramic glazed Menurkeys and a higher volume edition of smooth plaster Menurkeys. The ceramic editions will be offered in two versions – white or blue )both shown below). The white plaster editions will be smooth (also shown below). Having already sold out of the limited glazed ceramic versions, you can still purchase the white plaster Menurkey.

The White Ceramic Glazed Menurkey:



The Blue Ceramic Glazed Menurkey:


The White Plaster Menurkey:


What began as a way to encourage one of their son’s ideas has grown into a mission – whomever Caroline Baron and Anthony Weintraub (Asher's parents) tell about the Menurkey smiles and asks questions, and it’s a great way to discuss these two holidays. What better way to celebrate this strange but amazing occurrence with your family than with this funny and fascinating conversation starter?


above: Asher Weintraub with his parents and younger brother



BUY IT
Plaster Menurkey (White)
6.5” h X 8.5” w X 5.5” d
$50.00 + Shipping & Handling
buy it here.

They also have an iMenurkey app created by the makers of the iMenorah

images and information courtesy of Menurkey.com

Faith Off. Easter Vs. Passover by Jon Stewart.

As a parent of mixed faith children Jon Stewart thinks Passover celebrants have to take it up a notch to compete with the chocolate eggs and fake grass of Easter. Clearly, he is correct. And hilarious.

Let My People Drink. Moses Kosher Vodka.

Since most Jews are in the midst of celebrating Passover this week, I thought it might be a good time to introduce you to Moses Vodkas. Pure in spirit and true to the laws of the Jewish faith, Moses Vodka is the first ultra premium vodka certified kosher all year round.



Moses Vodka is an award-winning "super premium" vodka that includes the extra feature of being certified Kashrut or kosher. Fortunately enough, a miracle wasn't needed to create Moses Vodka. Just the Prophet's name, pure spring water, the choice of the finest raw ingredients, a unique filtration process, and the blessing of a Rabbi to deliver you a kosher product of true perfection.


above: Moses Vodka is available as both a super premium pure Vodka and a Date flavored Vodka.

From Finland (yes, there are Jews in Finland), it is certified under the supervision of Rabbi Dr. Moshe Edelmann. The vodka itself is made from a base of sugarcane (a vodka rather than a rum because it will have been distilled up to at least 190 proof prior to bottling) and blended down with natural spring water.



Rabbi Yaakov Westheim supervises the distillation process, making sure sugarcane is transformed into pure spirit using methods and machinery compliant to kashrut laws.





Rabbis Benjamin Gruber and Moshe Edelman are responsible for the production process and the quality of ingredients.



This includes a careful selection of raw ingredients, cleaning the bottling line and mixing tanks with boiling water, the usage of single-use materials in the production process wherever possible, strict hygiene rules to follow by the personnel throughout manufacturing and packaging.




As an additional note, as is common with some European vodkas there is a sugar additive to the spirit--sometimes called "rounding the spirit"--which will upset some vodka purists. For others, this is adds a welcome and flavorful smoothness to the vodka.

The Moses Vodka Gift Box:



• 1 bottle of Moses Vodka (750ml)
• 1 bottle of Moses Date Vodka (750ml)
• 4 shot glasses

The Vodka has won several awards for both taste and packaging.


Awards:
Silver - NYISC
Silver - Vodka Masters (design and packaging)
Silver - SFWSC
Silver - ISC
Gold - SIP Awards
MASTER - Vodka Masters

Some of their ads:


Moses Vodka can be purchased online at:
The Kosher Wine Company
Proof 66

To find other stores in various countries that carry Moses Vodkas, check here.

Moses Vodka