15 Great Holiday Gifts For Grinches. Or The Hippest Stuff For Haters.

Perhaps you know someone who's feeling a little more "Bah, Humbug" than "What A Wonderful World" this holiday season. Wondering what to buy the bitter one in your life? Fret no more, I've got a fabulous list of gifts for Grinches that are affordable and may even put a smile on the face of the most ornery curmudgeon this holiday season.

The "Best Wishes" Middle Finger Key:

All brass and designed to fit all Kwikset K1 locks, this housekey by Goodworth & Co. is flipping the bird with double sided imagery.
Buy it here

Go Away Doormat:

Enough said.
buy the Go Away Black Coir Doormat

The Fuck Off Wax Sealing Stamp:

Instead of sealing envelopes with a kiss, how about with an expletive?
buy it here

Hey Asshole note pad/check list (in two versions):


Gotta leave a note for your roommate or co-worker? I love this notepad by Knock Knock with tons of bitter options. One version has everything in handwriting, the other in sans serif print.
Buy the handwritten version here
Buy the brown sans serif version here

Fuck The Rain Umbrella:

The digitally printed polyester umbrella from Art Lebedev is so bitter, it's even flipping off nature. Buy it here.

People I Want To Punch In The Face Journal:

From 27th Street press, this little notebook's title says it all. Gold foil stamped with a sentiment that most of us share at sometime or another. Blank pages.
Buy it here.

Anti-Social T-Shirts, Totebags, Mugs and More:

From the hilarious folks at Someecards, the "I Wish There Was A Social Networking Site Where Everyone Would Leave me The Fuck Alone" sentiment can be purchased on a variety of items. Shop for them here.

I Hate Everything and I Hate People Cross Stitch Patterns:

Buy the I Hate Everything pattern here
Buy the I Hate People pattern here

"You Are Dumb" coffee mug:

This porcelain coffee mug does double duty. Holds your java while telling everyone around you off. From The Onion, it has their logo on the back side.
Buy it here.

Indelicate Doilies:

Reusable packages of printed doilies by Knock Knock say things to your guests you wish you could.
Buy the Indelicate Doilies here

Fuck Off Calling Cards (pack of 20):

Let your cards say it for you.
Buy them here

Same Shit Different Day Desk Calendar:

This perpetual calendar will stand on a desk or add charm to any wall. The poignant theme is repeated relentlessly, throughout the year. The dates are blank so you can use this any year that you want to! Calendar page measures 7.5 inches tall x 6 inches wide.
Buy it here

Bitter Pens:

You'll need something to fill out the Hey Asshole and Same Shit Different Day Calendar with..so why not these appropriate pens by Knock Knock?
Buy them here

The Misanthrope's Guide to Life (Go Away!) by Meghan Rowland and Chris Turner-Neal:


Misanthrope, n.: 1.) One who hates mankind; a curmudgeon; a loner; 2.) The guy in your office who responded to your e-mail of baby photos with "D-. Passing, but not college material"; 3.) A Realist

Quiz yourself:


In this guide, you'll learn how to get away from the pain-in-the-asses who make you seriously consider investing in a fallout shelter and making it your new home. You'll take isolated comfort in these survival strategies, including how to:

• Conduct managed incoherence to get the delivery boy from the lobby to your door
• Take a "French leave" in order to eat alone at work
• Get ousted from your kickball league by dressing as Magnum, P.I. for every game
• Get back at the jerk yapping on his cell phone by reciting the lyrics to Harry Chapin's version of "Cat's in the Cradle"
• End a conversation by "Gwynething" (also known as playing the "I'm delightfully foreign" act) someone to death

This is the survival guide you will be annoyed not to have. Available in paperback or Kindle edition.
Buy The Misanthrope's Guide to Life (Go Away!)

I Hate Everyone by Matthew DiBenedetti:

This 400 page paperback redefines the term hater. Inspired by too many years in a life sucking corporate job, and supported by a deep groundwork of family, friends, relationships and real "life" in a dark corner of New Jersey; even cheerful optimists will commiserate with and come love to hate with author Matt DiBenedetti.

Sample pages:


It's true: Misery does love company. But what kind of company can you keep if you can't stand anyone? This kind. No matter who they are or what they do that sets you off and gets you going, you'll find 'em inside. From rich people who are dicks to guys named Rich who go by Dick to those who are always cold to people who are just hot, no one is safe. But one thing is certain—everyone will find someone they equally despise. And you're gonna love it, period.
Buy I Hate Everyone

And there you have it. 15 gift options to make a Grinch grin this holiday season.

This Year's 10 Hippest Stocking Stuffers For Pop Culture Enthusiasts.

My picks for the ten most fun (and functional) stocking stuffers for fans of popular culture. Most are under $10 and all are creative, imaginative and most definitely hip.

One Up Designs' Printed Pencil Sets:

The $6 pencil sets from One Up designs are a great gift for lovers of pop culture and trends. Pencils printed with quotes from books, movies and music, the #2 pencils come in several colors and lots of options. Buy them here.

Tattly Temporary Tattoos:


The coolest (and safest) way to get inked. Tattly temporary tattoos are fun and imaginative gifts for everyone from designers to children. At only $5 a set, they are the perfect stocking stuffer for those who like to change their body art without a needle. Buy them here.

AJ's Toy Boarders:


Green, little and cool, Toy Boarders are an urban take on the classic plastic toy soldiers that promote action sports over violence. The designers at AJ's roots are skate, surf, & snow so when they design each rider they use real moves that would be used by today. Each Art Piece is hand molded with attention to detail and style. Toy Boarders now offers two sets of skateboarding figurines, the newest set of thrashers even includes a girl and a videographer (shown above). You can get a good look at the first set here.
Buy Them Here.

Archie Grand's "[BLANK] I Met and Liked" Notebooks:

Colored blank notebooks are embossed with titles of various occupations and characters that "I met and liked." With tons of options (From Models to Capitalists, Gardeners to Politicians, Brits to Architects and Fashionistas to Bloggers), these make hilarious and useful stocking stuffers. They have a rigid cover, are tread sewn and have a mate leathery lamination. The size is 160x115 mm to fit the pocket of a suit or a small evening bag. The notebooks / journals / scrapbooks contain 120 blank pages of high quality paper with a low emission signature. They are individually shrink-wrapped to keep the clean and protected. €9.95 each. Buy them here

Bandages worth cutting yourself for:

Okay, so I realize that was insensitive to self-mutilators. However, these bandages and the tins they come in are wickedly funny and worth giving yourself an intentional papercut.

Each tin includes between 15 and 25 flexible bandages, depending on the selection.
buy them here

Blue Q's Breath Sprays are packaged in hilarious blister packs with promises like "Enjoy Yor Job", "Understand Men" and "Accept The Fact That you Are Aging."

With 11 to choose from at only $5.49 each, you'll want to buy them all. Buy them here.

We Are Dorothy's Movie and Song lovers Maps:
The Film Map is based on the style of a vintage LA street map, but is made up entirely from film titles. The Map, which features over 900 films is the second in their series of 'Map' prints and is available to buy as a signed and stamped Limited Edition print and an Open Edition print.

The Song maps:

Two new editions of their Song Map are now available. A Special Edition Large Format print which is over twice the size of the original Map and a Saint Etienne Edition which is a print of the artwork they did for the band's 'Words and Music' album cover. buy the movie and song maps here.

Mimico Mimbots (USB flash drives):


Most everyone could make use a USB drive. Mimico has become THE company for designer USB drives that capitalize on popular culture. The Mimbots are available in various storage capacities and feature the likenesses of everything from Star Trek and Star Wars to Hello Kitty and Ugly Dolls.

buy them here.

Fred and Friends Keycaps:
Not only cute, but super useful. These fun keycaps will help you to identify individual keys on your overloaded keychain. Some even glow in the dark. Trendy imagery like Luche Libre masks, Sock Monkeys, Unicorns, Robots, Tikis, Skulls and more are affordable and fun.

Buy Fred Keycaps here

Showtime Series Goodies:
Fans of Showtime series Dexter, Weeds, Homeland, Shameless, Californication, Nurse Jackie, The L Word, House of Lies, the Borgias, etc. will appreciate the numerous t-shirts, mugs, caps, bobbleheads and exclusives to the online store.

The Dexter Garbage Bags, Weeds 420 T-Shirt, Nurse Jackie Coffee Mug and Shameless Sleep mask are a few of my favorites:

Shop for many more Showtime gifts here.

And there you have it, a bunch of hip stocking stuffers - most of which are under 10$ - and none of which will be regifted.

Can You Ear Me Now? EARonic iPhone Cases Make Great Gifts.

Available in five different styles these fun and hip iPhone cases give the illusion of blending into one's head when using the phone. Photographs of life sized ears and profiles in various styles - males, females, varying skin tones, some with razor stubble, some with earpieces - are printed on durable iPhone cases which fit both the iPhone 4 and iPhone 4S. No Vulcan ears as of yet.

The Modern Letter Opener from Hannah Martin London Is Now Available.

Hannah Martin of London, known for their elegant and modern jewelry designs, was set the task of reinventing the traditional letter opener by Wallpaper* Magazine earlier this year, as part of their 'Handmade' Issue.



above: sketches and protoypes of the letter opener

They had so many requests to put this into production, they caved under popular demand and have put the beautiful desk accessory into production in three finishes.

Anthracite Grey (solid brass with a grey powder-coated finish):



Intense Navy (solid brass with a navy blue powder-coated finish):



Silver (solid brass with heavy sterling silver plate):



The beautiful modern letter opener goes on sale Friday (tomorrow) at London's Design Museum in Anthracite Grey or Intense Navy. But it's available to purchase NOW at their online site, HannahMartinLondon.com, along with an exclusive sterling silver plated edition.

As with their jewels, this letter opener is handmade from start to finish in London.